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Postby [OESM]DeckonFrost-AS- » Sat Jun 30, 2001 8:16 pm

A man went to the doctors office because of a hideous disfigurement...his eye buldged out.

"Doctor, I have been to several specialists, and they say that there is nothing that can be done. You are my last hope...can you help me?"

The doctor replys: "Well, there is one procedure that has a 95% chance of working, but I want you to think about it for atleast a week before deciding on it. I have to cut your balls off."

The man thinks about this as he is leaving the office. As soon as he enters the waiting room he hears women shrieking, and children crying. He turns right around, enters the office, and says: "Cut 'em off doc, I'm tired of hearing the shrieks of terrified women and children"

The doctor performs the procedure, and the mans eyes receed back into his head.

A week later the man is walking down the street, and he notices that woemn are staring at him, but not because he is hideous, but because he now looks good. He decided that he's going to treat himself to a new set of cloths and go out for a night on the town.

He walks into the nearest taylor's shop and says: "I want a new suit, I want to look my best."

The taylor reply's: "Be back tomorrow, and I'll have it ready."

"Wait a minute, you haven't taken any measurements, how are you going to have my suit ready?" the man asks...

"Look son, I've been a taylor for 30 years, and I know a persons measurements just by looking at them."

The man says: "Prove it"

"Alright, you have a 16" neck line, 32" waist, 32" inseam,...., and you wear size 32 briefs."

"HAHA" The man laughs "I wear size 28 briefs"

"Son, if you wore size 28 Briefs, your eyes would buldge out"
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OESM Laugh Lounge

Postby DLinkOZ » Sun Jul 01, 2001 6:04 pm

Here's an old, overdone lame joke, but I always liked it:

A man goes to a doctor, very frantic about his condition. The doctor asks what's wrong. He replies "My penis is orange, and has been for about a month". The doctor exams him, and can't believe it when he sees the orange penis.

The man returns time after time to the doctor for more and more tests. The doctor even brings in other doctors to help consult on the problem. None of them can ever come to a conclusion as they've never seen any disease that turns the penis orange.

After 3 months of examing the man, the doctor asks if there's anything differently the man started doing when this started happening. The man replies "Well, all I do is come home after a long day at work to relax. So I grab a bag of cheetos and watch a porn".
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OESM Laugh Lounge

Postby Mr.Magoo » Mon Jul 02, 2001 10:50 pm

[16:31] [Axiom`Xo`R] magoo...wanna have pitty sex?
[16:31] [Magoo] id rather fuck a sheep or goat....still it is very satisfying to fuck a sheep or goat
[16:31] [Magoo] err
[16:31] [Axiom`Xo`R] bastard
[16:32] [Magoo] so its not you, its me
[16:32] [Axiom`Xo`R] ...
[16:32] [[FOoM]Levicon-FT-] ROFLMAO
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